Which came first: the medicine or the job?

Posted: February 22, 2014 in Crazy Life of Mine
Tags: , ,

So which comes first? Do I buy the medicine with money I can’t afford so I can function better so I can get a better job? Or get a job then I can afford the medicine?

I grew up in wealth. I have a hundred thousand dollar education. Every advantage. And I’m making about a dollar more an hour than I did twenty years ago.

I’m weary. I’m tired. No these are not the same things.

I need a job. A good job with benefits.

I want to get a good job so that I can get a better place then maybe I can have my kids more. What a pipe dream. They are going to be grown and gone and I’ll still be battling bipolar disorder. Alone.

I want a good job. I dream of a little house with rose bushes. I dream of my little girls playing in the yard then coming in for dinner. It’s a good dream and it is what keeps me going on days like today when I am tempted to quit.

Image courtesy of Danilo Rizzuti / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

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